You’ve probably been told or have heard that marriage is hard. My take on this is that relationships can be complicated and are constantly evolving, so we need to be consistently working on our relationships.
When it comes to your intimate relationship you are two people with your own thoughts, ideas and feelings. You have your opinions on things ranging from style of wedding through to how to arrange the food in the cupboard when unpacking the shopping (no, just me?)
Having been in the wedding industry for a number of years, I know there is a lot of information on how to plan a beautiful wedding, and i’ve put some of this info out there. However, there isn’t enough information on how to prepare for your marriage. Your wedding day is one beautiful amazing day, but your marriage is many, many days after.
Whilst I can help you plan that beautiful amazing day. Today I’m here to help you prepare for marriage.
I have four practical ways that engaged couples can do to prepare for your AMAZING marriage.
Get To REALLY Know Each Other
You wouldn’t be getting married if you didn’t know that you want to do life with your significant other. Getting to really know your partner is about delving deeper and having a more intimate understanding of the person you are about to marry. This means having some deep conversations that may make you both feel uncomfortable especially when you start doing this. My partner and I are completely different when it comes to conversations. I need to vent, talk out loud and may go into a bit of verbal diarrhea, this is how I process, where as he is more of a thinking it through kind of guy. I interpreted this as he didn’t want to share with me and I took it personally. What I’ve learnt to do is to give him the space to process and then he’ll share the relevant info with me. Studying the habits; both good + bad, body language, how they react in certain situations is so important to shaping your relationship. A starting point to understand your partner is their Love Language, take the quiz to understand your own and theirs. Connecting on a deeper level will help you get through the hard times in your relationship.
Invest In Each Other
It is so easy to let the stress of planning a wedding to cause a rift between the two of you. So one of the key things to do when planning your wedding is to schedule in Date Nights/Weekends, remember to do nice things for each other, regular sex, kiss more + be intimate, send them sexy or funny texts during the day, put your phones in a draw for a day or hour and focus on each other and respect the differences. I send spotify links to the other half of tunes I know he likes or is a reminder of a memory of a time we’ve had together. This let’s him know I’m thinking of him.
A doctor doesn’t turn up, wing a surgery and hope for the best. They learn from specialists about possible pitfalls, how to manage them, develop their skills and practice. You go through all the necessary training for your careers, so you can thrive in your chosen field.
However, couples walk down the aisle, say their vows and hope for the best. Why wouldn’t you take time to prepare for one of your most important relationships in your life?!
Let’s be clear, even those who have the strongest bond on wedding day can have some difficult times in the months and years ahead. Premarital coaching will help you work through those days and prepare for the future.
Keep Other People Out Of Your Relationship
Resist the temptation to let ‘all the people’ into your relationship, this includes family, casual friends and co-workers, especially when there has been a disagreement/argument. Everyone will have an opinion based on THEIR OWN experience, muddy your process and reinforce your negative vibes. I have two friends that I can talk to about my partner. They’ll listen, feedback and advise on ways to work through the issue (especially when I’m the issue) they’ll let me know in a loving, honest way. They know me, love me and are there to support me so that my relationship is a success. Who is your person or people?
Preparation for marriage in your engagement season is such a great investment into your relationship for the future. I don’t believe that any relationship is perfect, but I do believe that two people who love each other can learn to love each other well.
If your interested in premarital coaching check out what I offer here and book your free Chemistry Session.